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Stephanie C. Bell's avatar

Your inclusion of empathy is so astute. Thank you as always Bri!!! <3

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Bri Chapman's avatar

thank you Stephanie!! <3

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Stephanie C. Bell's avatar

I so appreciate your unique activist voice Bri!

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Matisse Enzer's avatar

Very good piece, I think.

I will add that in my experience many (most, I think) of the more difficult negotiations I have participated in were actually a combination of negotiation and active persuasion: trying to come to an agreement, but also trying to actively shift the counter-party's position, for example at Apple there situations where I wanted someone in management to change their mind about when or if a project was worth doing, where I knew that had expressed a certain position that I wanted to change, and the negotiation and persuasion happened at the same time. Another way of saying this was that some negotiations occur in a context where a pre-existing disagreement has been identified (sometimes quietly without a public statement.)

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Bri Chapman's avatar

oooh this is such a great point! I will noodle on this some and see how I think about it. I think you are right there may be a distinction between persuasion and negotiation.

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Susan Pawlicki's avatar

I always--and I'm being literal here--come away from reading your pieces thinking you are a wise young woman. My favorite point here is that negotiation isn't supposed to be antagonistic; it's supposed to help both parties find an answer that works for them. It's not about one side being victorious; it's about everyone getting a share in what happens. All your steps and the points within them and why they are effective are so clear! I'm borrowing from Sarah's playbook here, but have you considered printing them out in pamphlet form to leave around coffeeshops, campuses, and so on?

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Bri Chapman's avatar

Thank you so much for these kind words!! To steal a British word for my teacher who taught me British Literature, I am chuffed. :)

I loved reading your takeaways from this piece! That is such an interesting idea to create pamphlets and I have never thought of it before. I am now curious about what this could look like. Perhaps a zine format. So much to think about! thank you!!

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Rob Nelson's avatar

Bri, great effort on the agreement challenges. I agree with your comments, especially your recommendations to seek an agreement with mutual benefits. In our relationships, we strive to focus on the long term. We have now helped 14 different brands secure AutoZone Vendor Agreements. Each one is unique with many other "levers." We negotiated OEM supply agreements with Ford for the OEM F-150 truck brake business. We supply the full IndyCar series with their brakes. So you can see we help teams win and sustain business. I agree with you, TV and movie drama loves to paint negotiations as win-lose. Helping others identify who really has the authority to approve the agreement and to help the teams be certain that the person is involved in the input to the agreement. We strive to design agreement wind-down triggers and points of clarity for exit timing. On a personal note, my wife and I developed a strategy years ago where we separately write short lists of wants/needs. Then we meet to review them. Lots of giggling and conversations. One was scissors. Or, lack of. So we agreed to add more and different types of scissors. Problem solved. My amazing wife was my high school prom date. We recently celebrated our 57th wedding anniversary. I'm on Blue Sky with 21,900 followers: @porschejunkie.bsky.social

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Bri Chapman's avatar

I LOVE the scissors story!! this is amazing. So much great wisdom you have!

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